Is a car a good gift?

Wow, people who assume that all children are alike amaze me.  How can people say that just because someone is given a car they are or will become a spoiled brat?  Every child is different.  Each is shaped by the many people and things in their life.  Each parent has to find a middle ground between needs and wants.

My husband and I gave both of our children a car when we could afford it and they had a need for it.  We raised them to understand the value of a dollar and not to worry about what the other received on a particular date, but rather to consider the circumstances surrounding the giving of the item. 

Our daughter received her car when she was 16.  She was an honor roll student who had a part time job and she go off work late at night during the summer.  She also got a cell phone to go along with the car in case there was trouble.  She never once miss-used the phone and did not have an accident until she was 19 (and that happened in broad daylight after she dropped off unwanted clothing at a charity – not after a party).  She is now 24, has a Masters degree in accounting, and has begun the researching her first new car purchase.  She is one of the most financially responsible young adults I know. 

Our son did not receive his car until he was 18.  He did not work in high school so there was no need for him to have a car of his own.  We asked him if he wanted one at 16 so he could find a job but HE felt he was not responsible enough and needed to concentrate on his schoolwork.  When there was a need, he borrowed a car.  He is 22 now and I’ve asked him if he resents not getting his car until 18.  He says he understood then and still has no problem with it.

With a little luck and a lot of hard work, we raised two kids who got what they needed (and a lot of what they wanted) and were never spoiled by it.  We are debt free and have healthy savings and retirement accounts.  Just to show how not spoiled or greedy our kids are, a relative recently gave us $7000 to pass on to our children and each of them told us to keep the money to help cover college expenses.  We hope we never have to ask our children for help but are quite sure that if we ever need help they will do what they can, just as we did while they were growing up.

I think it is extremely unfair for anyone to assume that I am the same person now at 43 that I was back when I was 16. People do learn from their mistakes as they mature. My parents and I have discussed the subject of the car I turned my nose up at back then and we actually laugh about it. My dad says I was a brat and he is probably right but they love me no less ..I am still their daughter. There were no hard feelings over it. My dad actually made money on reselling it - so he was happy. It turned out just fine.

Thanks hkaur for the support ;)

Every time I see those lexus commercials for the holidays where they give someone a car w/ a big fat red ribbon, it makes me wonder who the target audience is! No one I know can afford to give that kind of gift. I hear of celebs who lavish each other w/ expensive cars, but that's what they do. Normal working class people have a budget of $50 per person, if that!

No, a car is not a good gift, just as many folks have mentioned - what about the additional/later/ongoing costs?

It reminds me of the year someone gave me a ready to use cell phone.  All signed up to a plan, etc..  With the caveat that I'd take over the monthly bill after the first three months.  Some gift!  The balance of the contract cost considerably more than the initial investment or I had the choice to pay the 'fee' to cancel the contract and let the phone collect dust.  I never even said I wanted a cell phone and you know what, as hard as it is to believe in 2009, I really can live without one.  Gifts with conditions are just not gifts.  I think even a dictionary could verify that.