The 13 worst holiday spending blunders

Clearly the issue here is that we think money speaks louder than our intentions. It doesn't. Really. So before you hit the store, delete the guilt files from your operating system.

Procrastination problems

Putting off holiday shopping may cost you.

• Last-minute largesse: It's the night before Christmas, Hanukkah or Kwanzaa and you are out cruising the stores that are open until midnight trying to get all your shopping done in one furious frenzy. But because you realize that this blows the whole "thought that counts" thing, the thoughtless gifts you buy are also wretchedly expensive.

• FedEx folly: You bought your niece in Nebraska a great new CD but waited so late to mail it that you're spending more on shipping than the gift cost.

Really. Why do you think we are publishing this column now, except to give you a shot at shopping in a timely fashion? As financial planner Steinmetz points out, "Those who celebrate Hanukkah at least have some excuse -- those holidays move around. But, hello, Christmas is always on the 25th. So what's the problem?"

Holiday spirit overdrive

It sounds like a '70s lounge band, and maybe it should have been. In reality, it's a financial crime of passion. An insane impulse overcomes you --- holiday joy? The spirit of Santa? Your medication is off? --- and you find yourself committing one (or all) of the following:

• Debt of 1,000 gifts: Getting everyone, I mean everyone, a little gift: all of your co-workers, the woman who cleans your house, the neighbor who jump-started your car in 1986, your baby-sitter, your dentist, etc. -- to the tune of $4,876.

• Parental panic: You lay out all the gifts you got for the kids, and suddenly it's just not enough. You love those kids so much. You can't let them limp into January so deprived. What were you thinking? Back to the mall!

• Manic Martha-ism: For once, you're going to celebrate the holidays in style. You're going to throw that holiday party, take the kids to the "Nutcracker," the Ice Capades and the "Clifford the Big Red Dog Live!" show. You're going to cater a big holiday dinner and fly your parents in, and pay Martha Stewart to inject some holiday cheer into your décor.

Plead guilty, because there are too many witnesses. This year, when you sense an attack of holiday spirit coming on, send a card.

Eggnog wishes, caviar dreams

These are amazingly silly, but common, miscalculations in terms of volume, time or value.

• Shopping by the truckload: You go to Costco or the mall and buy everything in sight, simply because there's so much to buy.

• The 12 days of shopping: You haven't found the perfect gift for her yet. You know you will. Meanwhile, you'll just pick up a pair of these earrings. And a little scarf. . . . And by the time you reach the end of your Quest for Perfection, you have 27 gifts, none of them quite right, except maybe the pear tree with the partridge in it.

• Art-fair amnesia: December is upon you, so you dash out and do all your shopping -- completely forgetting that you already bought half the presents at that crafts fair in July.

These costly little slip-ups can happen in a variety of ways. How to prevent them is unclear. If only we could get them on video. At least you'd get a laugh out of yourself.

The 'unreturnable' impulse

This one deserves its own category because, of all spending blunders, it is the most preventable. Every year countless people fall into a stupor as they enter one of those vile shops full of ceramics, glass and twisted bronze ballet sculptures -- and accidentally buy one for someone they love, who will inevitably hate it.

Two words on this one: Just don't.

• Tell us: Can you really do Christmas cheaply?

Updated Nov. 19, 2007

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