Giving thanks for the mess we're in

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Later this week we are to take time out of our busy lives, share a big meal with family and friends, and give thanks. Well, when that time comes you might want to consider thanking the following:

Thanks, Mr. Greenspan, for slashing rates and making credit so easy to get that we now have a housing sector in turmoil, foreclosures hitting levels not seen in decades and bankruptcy filings back on the rise. Nice work.

Thanks, President Bush, for overseeing the collapse of the U.S. dollar. My family didn't want to take that trip to Italy anyway. Toss in the whole war effort and near $100 per barrel oil, and it's a wonder your approval ratings are this high.

Thanks to all the members of Congress who in 1947 passed the 22nd Amendment to the U.S. Constitution.

Thanks, Sen. Joseph Biden, for adding some humor to the Democratic presidential debates. Nobody does more with less time than you!

Thanks to the federal grand jury that indicted Barry Bonds. The man couldn't carry the jockstrap of Hank Aaron or Babe Ruth -- well, at least not without pumping himself full of performance enhancing drugs. Please, pretty please, just quietly fade away.

Thanks to all the writers in Hollywood that have gone on strike. I'm in favor of anything that promises to keep "Dirty Sexy Money" and "Big Shots" off the air. However, just asking here, but should the folks that wrote "Cavemen" really get a raise?

Thanks to Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke for having less of a spine than Alan Greenspan. All those rate cuts really helped to curtail the housing slowdown and limit the credit crunch -- we hardly read anything about those problems anymore, thanks to you. Moreover, no worries about inflation or the dollar. You've clearly got a good handle on those two issues as well.

Thanks to Oprah for, well, being Oprah -- and for making nice with David Letterman.

Thanks to the parents of Lindsay, Britney, Paris and Nicole for making the rest of us feel like we deserve Parent of the Year.

You see, even though the market is in a tailspin, we have lots to be thankful for this year.

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