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6. Wills, trusts and powers of attorney.
They are probably outdated. If this is your first marriage, they may not exist at all. Make this a catalyst for, at least, a simple will and power of attorney. You may be the beneficiary of your parents' will or life insurance policy, or named by them in a deed. If you were unmarried when they created these bequests, your siblings are likely to inherit in "your place and stead," should you meet an untimely demise.
It's important to diplomatically remind your parents or other benefactors that your new spouse is your preference, should the unthinkable happen. Remember though, it's still their choice. Speak to them again in a year if they seem reluctant to name your sweetheart as your substitute beneficiary directly after the marriage.
7. Health-care proxies and other nonmonetary designations.
Who is listed as the emergency contact at your health club, office or school? Check these for your own safety and your family's convenience.
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9. Contracts.
Are you in a contract to receive or pay money, or in a business deal of any kind? If so, read the paragraph that relates to the rights and responsibilities of your heirs. I guarantee it's there, but you skipped over it because it had no meaning at the time.
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Treat these with the greatest care. Check out who is the beneficiary, and see your accountant to understand the ramifications of a change. Do this early in your marriage, and the information you get will help you make pension decisions throughout your work and married life.
Once you have identified the areas that you must address, here are some practical ways to take care of things with dispatch:
- Involve your spouse. Changing beneficiaries on health, veterans and insurance benefits will take time and poring through some paperwork. By sharing the load with your spouse, you accomplish three things: First, you prove your loyalty. Second, you inform your spouse of his or her rights so that none of your entitlement goes missing. Third, you engage your spouse in a dialogue about which of his or her documents must be changed to name you as beneficiary instead of parents, former spouses or others.
- Deal with conflicts and disagreements. In a second marriage, there may be competition with children of the first family. The renaming of beneficiaries brings it out in the open in a constructive way, so you can resolve the problem.
None of these issues is necessarily fun, but they're necessary. You can avoid later conflicts and unwelcome surprises by working through these issues early in your marriage.
Adriane G. Berg is a speaker, author and lawyer specializing in personal finance.
Updated June 2, 2009
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